Victoria dates a self-centered hand model (Sean Hayes).
Joy cannot determine the age of her date (Phil Morris).
Melanie dates a guy (Sean O'Bryan) who enjoys leaving the lower half of his body unclothed.
The girls invite all their dates to a dinner party, with predictably disastrous results.While waiting in a long bathroom line at the Cleveland Browns football game, the girls tell Elka the story of how they met each other in Los Angeles in the late 1980s.(This episode features two clips of the game show Body Language featuring Betty White as a celebrity partner, digitally altered to include an "Elka" nametag.)Joy dates a 22-year-old blind man (Randy Wayne), who believes that she is 26 years old.This season premiered on November 30, 2011 and ran straight through until June 6, 2012.Guest stars in season three include Kathie Lee Gifford, Sandra Bernhard, Laura San Giacomo, Gilles Marini, Don Rickles, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Joe Jonas, Huey Lewis, John Mahoney, Susan Lucci, Elka is forced to choose between her thought-to-be-dead husband Bobby (Don Rickles), her old boyfriend, Max and her new boyfriend/fiancee, Fred.
Elsewhere, Victoria takes advantage of her marriage to Joy and appears on a View rip-off talk show called "The Chatter", hosted by female celebrities Christal (Kathie Lee Gifford), Jada (Kym Whitley) and Libby (Valerie Azlynn).
The girls go on a gay cruise, where Victoria plans to speak about her "relationship" with Joy, until they both fall for the captain, Captain Lebeau (Gilles Marini).
Melanie runs into her sister, Caroline (Laura San Giacomo), and discovers she is a lesbian.
Caroline's lover (Sandra Bernhard) makes a pass at Melanie, after Melanie pretends to be a lesbian to stay on the cruise.
Elka teaches Melanie and the girls how to crash a funeral, to help Melanie find a missing dress.
Joy and Victoria must face things from their pasts, while Elka reunites with Roy (John Mahoney) a former acquaintance.