Dating today sucks because men don't want to and don't have to put forth any effort. Dating today sucks because technology has made things progressively less personal, a phenomenon making it progressively easier to not put in any effort. Contemporary women are inactive bystanders, forced to abide my the whims of effort-repellent men. Just so you didn't forget, dating today sucks because men don't want to and don't have to put forth any effort.Basically, the sky is falling, and it's all Twitter's fault!
Along with the points listed in the articles, "People feel entitled to know your business," says 29-year-old scientist Marguerite Matthews, adding, "As if an affiliation on Twitter/Facebook/Instagram/Tumblr gives them the right to inquire about the many details of your personal life." This makes dating more competitive, budding relationships less concrete, and the whole experience less fun." While I'm a bit past the murky waters of the low expectation/hook-up/Wendy's value meal on a champagne budget/"let's chill sometime and watch The Best Man" abyss, I'm not so far removed from it that I don't remember it.
At the same time, though, I don't know if I can completely get behind the idea that this low-expectation digital-age dating paradigm shift is both ubiquitous and a male-driven process.
And, perhaps the "death of courtship" isn't necessarily a terrible thing.
First, while I'm sure it's true that certain technological advances have altered the dating landscape, this is not everyone's reality.
There has always been—and will always be—lazy daters.
And, there have always been—and will always be—people (women and men) who date more traditionally.Technology hasn't changed behavior for everyone as much as it has just made things easier for people who likely would have been lazy daters anyway.Most importantly, though, these articles reinforce the idea that women have absolutely no hand in the dating, courting, and relationship process.And, I'm saying this not from the "men only do what women allow them to do" angle but from the unthinkable idea that many women may actually, gasp, prefer the digital dating era. If men are supposed to approach women, then women are put in a relatively passive position where they're forced to wait for the right man to show interest.Also, a "traditional" date—where a man is supposed to invite a woman on a date on his dime—can create a situation where the man feels entitled to physical activity because he's spent money (and where a woman feels pressured to reward him for his troubles)."There's less pressure when meeting someone informally at a house party or through a mutual friend," adds Jemison.