I’m just this whole ball of pain and shame and I mean, whether I’d be in classes or at work, I’d just be hearing other people talking about what they were doing or what was going on for their dating life, for their Valentines Day and I would just be so uncomfortable. ” and I was sounding so nervous and shifty-eyed and sweating out my armpits and my forehead was probably sweating. You don’t want to treat yourself like kicking a dog or something. That was pretty awkward.” Call a friend, talk about it, laugh about it and then guess what? Because then let’s say you get better, let’s say you get more comfortable, let’s say you get more at ease, not by getting it all perfect in your head or watching some pickup artists’ program that tells you the 43 texts to send her so she’ll sleep with you without ever having to look her in the eye.
And so, that’s just to paint a picture of where I’m at and the reason I’m doing this is to maybe you’re at that place right now yourself, maybe you’re listening to me and being like, “Oh, my God that’s me. Get out of my head, man.” And I’m doing that to show that I’ve been there and I know that the pain and the discomfort of that. The real pain though for me and it might be for you too if you’re in this place is there is nothing I can do about it. And one of the biggest parts of the pain around that is not the loneliness, it’s not the wanting to connect but not having someone to be with, to touch, to talk to, to make love with. It’s just sort of this like, as I said in the intro like feeling like you’re a drift in the current of the ocean and I have no rudder, I got no motor, I got no ores, I’m just going to kind of float around here and hope that the wind blows me into an island. Listen, you don’t – I really, I really am missing my left foot, okay? Get a prosthetic which is getting more and more amazing by the way. Absolutely 100%, 1000% false and the only thing that’s keeping you from seeing that is the story and the avoidance that comes from a story, right? Do you see how this is going to keep you stuck for the rest of your life? You will leave with a renewed sense of passion and purpose about creating the dating life you’ve always wanted. You will learn step-by-step how to build natural, healthy confidence in yourself, start conversations with anyone, begin interacting with the women you find most attractive, and ultimately get dates and create awesome relationships! Today is the time of year that you probably hate if you’re single because it’s Valentines Day and I never put too much stock into a lot of holidays especially Valentine’s day. Go talk to one woman today even if it’s just “Hey, what time is it? That’s what I talk about and 30 Days to Dating Mastery you’ll see I talked about as a process where you are going to go step-by- step. It’s okay if this one doesn’t respond to you, there will be another opportunity and if you really want to get more comfortable talking to women, I want to offer you a free gift. Dating can be hard, frustrating, confusing and sometimes depressing. The key is to realize who is in charge of your dating life, and ultimately your dating destinty (hint: you are! Aziz as he shares stories about dating breakthroughs from his own life and those of his clients. Aziz’s powerful dating confidence program – 30 Days To Dating Mastery. Find out what really happens and you will see that you’re going to learn from it and whatever happens, view it as a process.
I personally grew up with my mom saying, “That holiday was just created to sell cards, Hallmark cards.” And so, I never really put too much stock into it, although now that I’m with my lady, Candice my wife, she’s taught me how to appreciate that sort of thing and actually make them special. The first time you go up and talk to a woman, you’re probably going to go down in flames and the second time you talk to a woman, you’re probably going to go down in flames. ” Ask her what time it is if you’re terrified to talk to a woman. You want to look at each individual interaction with a woman as the end or be all. If you go to 30Daysto Dating that’s the number 30Daysto Dating and then enter your email there, I’m going to send you a free copy of my e Book Seven Ways to Start Conversations with Women Anywhere Anytime.
But for much of my life, I was single on Valentines Day and even though I thought to myself “Oh, it’s just a holiday made up to sell cards” it still affected me. I tell stories about this in my program 30Days to Dating Mastery. Often times, women don’t respond in that situation, sometimes they do but don’t expect it. It’s about getting comfortable and then working your way up. I can’t get into all that now because we have limited time but you got to work your way up. So, go there and get that now to help you with your action step for the day.
You know you’d see it on TV or people would talk about it or just it would be in the world around you and it would just be this little reminder that I didn’t have anyone that I was going on a date with. I mean if you really want to take charge of your dating destiny, you want to go much deeper than this episode. Start by walking down the street and when you see a woman that you’re attracted to, just saying hey as you walk by, how’s it going? You might have big dark sunglasses on and walking fast, that’s okay. The key is to test it out and see what really happens and when you do, you’ll realized dude the stories didn’t matter at all. It will give you just a bunch of simple ideas and the feedback I’ve gotten, I was talking to one guy who got 30Days to Dating Mastery recently and he said there are so much pickup artists stuff out there so I go your free e Book there and I started reading it. ” These were like basic obvious simple ways to start conversations. It’s about working on myself and my own confidence and it’s not about some weird script to seduce her and it felt awesome feedback because that’s exactly my intention is to help you be a real normal person.
I didn’t have anyone that I was in a relationship with. You know let’s say if I was dating a number of people and I was in between relationships but that wasn’t my experience. Check out 30Days to Dating Mastery, my program 30Daysto Dating I survived and sure, I was a little uncomfortable and at that time I didn’t have much self-compassion so I beat the crap out of myself, but in 30 Days to Dating Mastery, I also and from this podcast, you’ll learn all about, a lot more about self-compassion, right? The reality is you got to get out there and you got to test it. You can learn strategies to improve your chances, that’s what I teach in the 30 Days program but no amount of strategy is going to help you unless you start getting out there and talking to woman after woman after woman. I dated many, many amazing, intelligent beautiful women and it didn’t – my eyes didn’t change and I get skin grafts to cover up certain pigmentation in my eye. The most amazing woman I could find that I chose out of all the women that I was dating, I was the selector and I chose the most amazing fit for me and it’s incredible and my eyes didn’t change, I’m in good shape. And so, this stuff doesn’t matter and I have so many women I’ve interacted with and the same can be true for you and a person after person I’ve talked to and I’ve worked with directly or that I’ve heard feedback from 30 Days to Dating Mastery that they realized that it doesn’t affect them in any way to have these flaws or these shortcomings. In fact it’s time for you to break out of your story which brings us to your action step. You know most guys don’t want to become the next world’s greatest pickup artist. If there is dissatisfaction, if there is frustration, if there is pain, good.
You know my experience is I’m not dating anyone right now and I kind of never really am because I’m a weird loser. It would bring up this realization of I’m not really where I want to be in my dating life and most importantly I don’t even feel that good about myself. You will learn step-by-step all of this stuff, how to change your self-esteem, how to see yourself differently, how to know your strengths and your value with women then how to interact with people, how to be more comfortable just starting conversations and let go of embarrassment, free yourself from that fear of rejection and get out there and start talking to specifically women and you work your way up step-by-step so you’re not jumping into the deep end like tomorrow go out and talk to five beautiful women. So, we do step-by-step to gradual exposure model and it’s getting phenomenal feedback so check that out if you want to go deeper. So, you got to treat yourself with kindness along the way. Physically, I take care of my body but I’m not muscular buff dude. They just want to be comfortable talking to women, meet some awesome women, have some great dates, find a great girlfriend, have a wife, and have a family.
I don’t really know how to meet women or date women and the whole thing is a mystery and I suck at it and I’m not very good. But I talked about in that program is my experiences, the first three times I tried to talk to women. Oh, my God, it is just so embarrassing just her looking at me like, “Who is this guy? Learn how to handle the rejection with kindness, with mercy, with forgiveness. Because that’s safe driven party he was like, “Oh, I can get laid without any risk whatsoever.” And guess what? I mean, just be a normal person and that’s exactly what that e Book will help you do. And that about brings us to the end of our show today and to circle it back around to the beginning, Valentines Day and just go easy on yourself.